Amid the uproar over the Obama administration's audacity to require employers to offer insurance for all medical needs, including birth control, certain Republican members of Congress have put forth a new plan.
Free Vagina Spackling:
Offered as an alternative to birth control, this new plan offers any woman the opportunity to spackle their vagina shut, hence eliminating the need for birth control.
When asked about the complications that may arise from such a procedure (e.g. to where would menses flow), a male Republican member of the Committee to Undermine the Nation's Trust in Sex ( or CUNTS for short) had this to say:
Free Vagina Spackling:
Offered as an alternative to birth control, this new plan offers any woman the opportunity to spackle their vagina shut, hence eliminating the need for birth control.
When asked about the complications that may arise from such a procedure (e.g. to where would menses flow), a male Republican member of the Committee to Undermine the Nation's Trust in Sex ( or CUNTS for short) had this to say:
We don't like to think about that nasty lady business.
When asked to comment on her Republican colleague's statement, a Democratic female member of Congress stated:
We are planning to ban Viagra and call it the Dick's for Dildo's
Program. Turn in your bottle of Viagra and get a dildo of your choice as a replacement. Makes as much sense as what my 'esteemed' Republican
colleagues have put forth...
Ah, our tax dollars at work...
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