In yet another unique move, Angelina Jolie has decided to completely alter her life. She has left Brad Pitt and her children behind to pursue her new dream. Ms. Jolie is going to become a man.
"After much soul searching and reflection, Ms. Jolie has realized that her deepest desire is to become the man she always wanted to steal." Read the statement from Ms. Jolie's publicist.
The more jaundiced members of DM's staff think that she has set her sights on a gay man. But, when asked if this was the case, Ms. (soon to be Mr.) Jolie's publicist replied, "No, she isn't interested in a man. The new object of her affections has the initials: J.A."
-A. F.
